As far as I can remember I have always been an open book, living my life out loud. I have shared every aspect of my life with others and never thought twice about it. That was until I lost a few friends in my adult life. Friendship is supposed to be life journeys safe zone. A ‘no judgement zone’ that allows you to be vulnerable and not ashamed. When that truth became rifled, I became closed off. No longer wanting to share my experiences. That was until my broken heart started to heal. (Reference previous post, “The Other B Words“)
No matter the type of relationship and how it ends, there is a grieving process. Grief work is hard work. Grief happens seasonally. As seasons change and things transition in and out of our lives, we as human beings are stretched mentally, emotionally and physically. Trying to get over, past or around things that affect us in positive and negative ways.
The scars look different based on the wound it is from. I had to be reminded that God’s grace is sufficient as my wounds healed. Sisterhoods, brotherhoods, romantic and intimate relationships, parents passing, career changes, obstructions and developments – were all molded by God’s grace and covered with His mercy.
Last week I posted, “Don’t Fake The Funk” This week I’m reminded that it is OK to “Show Your Scars”. Consider this — my mommy had a cute little indentation on her forehead. When I asked her what had happened, she said that she was playing one day and fell and hit her head on a coffee table. It looked like it hurt bad and would always serve as a reminder when she looked in the mirror to be cautious of her actions and surroundings. To me the scar was beautiful, but by the story of pain she endured I knew I didn’t want one. I would walk up to my mom and wiggle my finger in the indentation and that physical touch always reminded me when I was younger, to be careful when playing in the house around the coffee table because I didn’t want to be hurt like my mommy.
My mommy’s flaws, scars, imperfections, triumphs – were all gracefully beautiful to me. The sharing of her scars and the wounds that caused them saved me world of hurt, heart ache and pain. Life is experienced in two ways, pain or lessons. I prefer lessons. I appreciate my mommy’s scars, they were Path Pavers (see previous post) that allowed me to become stronger and wiser.
I said all of that to say this, “SHOW YOUR SCARS!” You never know how sharing the healing of that wound will bless someone. We spend so much time trying to cover our scars, not realizing that we can help someone along a similar path heal and possibly minimize their scars.